Behind Your eyes
by Gunni11
Summary: A Charlie and Joey from home and away story.Starting on the day at the warf when Joey leaves.
1. Chapter 1

_I'm inspired by lyrics from Amy Grant, each sequence starts with a song, the headline is the title of the song. This story starts at the warf when Joey leaves_

**The feeling I had.**

_I cannot take the heat, this girl's going home. Standing on my own two feet, standing alone.  
I'm just a little weary of all the talk and all the buzz, and all I ever wanted was the feeling I had with us.  
I cannot take the heat I guess I'm letting go. I'm tired of stitching up my dreams with this thread of hope.  
I'm still a believer of Twin hearts and timeless love ,and all I ever wanted was the feeling I had with us  
All I ever wanted was the feeling I had with us.  
The road of life is rugged, any road you choose, and when I find the other side I'll look for you  
But I cannot take the heat, and so I'll say goodbye. A million things I never said, didn't even try.  
'cause words are cheap and sometimes cruel, And stuff you hear is seldom true. And all I ever wanted was the feeling I had with you._

The words pierce my soul. How can I be so stupid to stuff up a great relationship? Seeing her now, ready to leave me, how am I supposed to survive without her? I can't believe that I'm doing this, saying goodbye to the woman I love. Can't she see it? See that I love her, that I would take it back a million times if I could?

I'm starting to cry again, I hardly ever cried before I met her, she pulled down all my walls, and now she leaves me, standing here vulnerable, how can I go on without her? Can't she see that all I want too is the feeling I had with us, with her. I love her, I'm not even able to utter the words as I stand here, watching her throwing her stuff on the boat.

I beg her to stay, we are twin hearts, she has to feel it too! I can see in her eyes that she does. She just cannot take the heat. Can I blame her?

No, I can't, but I want her to stay, to work things out. She kisses me, I can't believe this is the last time. She said she would look for me when, if, she finds the other side. Well, I'll be waiting for her, because all I ever want is the feeling I had with us, with her.

**Innocence lost**

_I can't relive my life, I can't retrace my tracks. I can't undo what's done, there is no going back.  
I chased a selfish dream, did not survey the cost. Illusions disappeared, I've found my innocence lost.  
Some say it's lessons learned, some say it's living life. I say it's choices made, knowing wrong from right .  
One night I fought to sleep, in my slumber I turned and tossed. I woke to a cloudy day and found my innocence lost.  
Innocent child is a beautiful thing, secure in her father's arms, sleeps while a mother sings.  
There's no way to know all the harm this world can bring, I miss my innocence, Oh, to be innocent._

I regret my actions every day, what wouldn't I give for a time machine. Go back to the time before I slept with Hugo, no, go back to before I stupidly ran away from her on the boat. She is the best thing that has ever happened to me, and I, the stupid ass I am, have to go and ruin everything. I never dreamt I could cheat on anyone.

Guys has cheated on me, and I hated it. I thought I would never hurt another human being like that. Then I went and did exactly that, cheated on the one person I love. I don't think I have loved anybody before her.

The way she makes me feel, I have never experienced that before. Oh, I wish I could be innocent again. Curling up in her arms as a child curls up in her father's arms, secure in the embrace. Falling asleep to the song playing in my heart. I love her.

I only thought about myself when I did it. It was the day from hell, I thought I would be stronger. I was selfish, I didn't think about what it would cost us, me. I didn't think at all. The price for my mistakes are too high, I can't pay it. I miss her, I want her to come back to me, but how can I undo what I have done?

**Cry a river**

_Who knew love would come walking thru my door, turn a light on somewhere down inside. And give me a feeling I'd never had before. It was a long wait, it was just the wrong time.  
But I hope you'll hold me now, somewhere within. And when you think about what might have been:  
Cry a river, flood the sea. Cry a river over me. Take the bitter with the sweet, and cry a river over me._

_How can you argue with a feeling in your bones, about what is and what isn't meant to be. Some things you live with, but you never let it show, like the pain I felt the day I watched you leave.  
But I hope you'll think of me when tender winds blow. Sit on the shores of love and just let it go…_

I miss her so much. I'm sitting on the pier, letting my feet hang in the water. Somehow it makes me feel like I'm connected with her. I didn't expect to fall in love. How was I supposed to know that when she came walking into the Surfclub that day? how could I know she was the one for me?

But she struck a chord in me, she turned the light on, I didn't even know that I had a light. When I look back, I think I fell in love that day even though I didn't know... I watched her working behind the counter, she was doing a really good job, I was there with Martha, I have to confess I don't know what she was talking about, except some diving we could do with Hugo.

Hugo, Hugo, Hugo, I didn't listen. I looked at her, she was beautiful, her dark hair flowing down her back. She moved with ease behind the counter, elegant, as if she was a dancer. Then this guy came, Robbo. He intimidated her, she was scared. She ran and hid in the storage room. I couldn't help it, I had to follow her, I wanted to protect her, hold her, comfort her.

She was standing with the back to me, crying her eyes out. She didn't hear me come in, I scared her. I had to muster all my self-control not to embrace her, holding her, assuring her nothing could hurt her. I settled with touching her shoulder, she nearly jumped out of her skin. She was so scared, but there was nothing I could do.

Oh, I love her. I cry so much, I could probably fill up the ocean on my own. Does she miss me? I imagine that she holds me, that she still loves me, somewhere deep inside. Maybe she cries over me like I cry over her. I have to live with the pain I caused us, I betrayed her. The pain she caused me when she left… it's so painfull, but it's my fault, and I have to live with that, I just don't know how…_  
_

**Beautiful**

_I'm looking for a way to feel you hold me. Feel your heartbeat just one more time. Reaching back, trying to touch the moment. Each precious minute that you were mine.  
How do you prepare, when you love someone this way, to let them go a little more each day?  
The stars we put in place. The dreams we didn't waste. The sorrows we embraced. The world belonged to you and me, the oceans that we crossed. The innocence we lost. The hurting at the end, I'd go there again 'Cause it was beautiful ,It was beautiful  
Some days, missing you is overwhelming. When it hits me you're not coming back. And in my darkest hours, I have wondered, was it worth it for the time we had?  
My thoughts get kind of scattered, but one thing I know is true, I blessed the day that I found you.  
The rules we stepped aside, The fear that we defied, the thrill of the ride. The fire in our hearts that burned. The oceans that we crossed, the innocence we lost.  
The hurting at the end… I'd go there again, 'Cause it was beautiful, It was beautiful._

I'm crying my heart out again. What am I supposed to do. I can't keep doing this. I can't live without her, but I don't think she is coming back to me. I haven't heard anything from her. I miss her so much, my heart shatters when I remember her touch, when I think about how she said my name. She made me feel beautiful, not because I'm good looking, but because of who I am. She saw past my exterior.

She loved me, I think about every minute that we had together. The short time we had together, it seemed like a lifetime, but even a hundred lifetimes would be too short time with her. She took me to the stars, she put the world in order. We could do anything as long as we were together. I want to be there for her, helping her through the tough times dealing with the rape, and the court case that is coming up. I think there's more going on in her life too, there's something that just doesn't add up. Now I might never know.

If I could have seen you that night, what would we be doing now?

This is just too hard, was it really worth it, we had such a short time, being a couple. This heartache now, is it worth it?

I had love for a short time, I still love her. but I can't see a glimmer of hope, no silverlining on the dark clouds covering me. But I can't help it, I would go there again. It's really all I want, to go there again, even if it would bring more heartache. Being with her for just a minute makes it worth it. It was so beautiful, I don't think she'll be back, how can I go on?

**I don't know why**

_This is one of those moments when all that really matters is crystal clear. We are woven together by whatever threads of life that have brought us here. We are stripped of all our layers, we are getting to the core, Tell me something real and nothing more  
cause I don't know why, I don't know how, I don't know where, Baby all I know is love. _

_So I'm here between the bookends of everything that was and what will be. There's a wealth of every nation, not so many answers It seems to me. So I face the unfamiliar and nothing's clear, Only blinding faith can carry me from here.  
And I don't know why, I don't know how, I don't know where. Baby all I know is love.  
Hold my hand and hold this moment, time sure feels precious don't it? Life is always changing, this I know  
I don't know why, I don't know how, I don't know where, Baby all I know is now, Baby all I know is now._

Again, I'm down at the pier. I don't know what to do, I can't seem to move on, I'm stuck. I brought her ipod, listening to her songs is heartbreaking, but no matter what I do, it's heartbreaking. I miss her so much, I dream about her at night. In the day I sometimes think I can hear her steps, or I can hear her voice. I even sometimes can feel her hand brush my arms. When I look, she's never there.

Guess what I do then? I cry, again. I'm sitting here, closing my eyes. I want to remember her sent, her soft skin, her arms embracing me. There's someone walking on the pier. I just want to scream at them, disturbing my daydream, I want to get lost in my memories.

She sits down behind me, putting her arms around my waist. It's so real, I can feel it, but it's only a daydream. If I open my eyes, she'll go away. I keep them closed, I want to keep her here as long as I can. She leans her head on my shoulder, I can smell her. She is so real, I cry, I want her to be here. She lets her hand run down my arm to my hand, she takes the Ipod, shifting song. It must be I doing it. I haven't heard the song before.

The song is torture, how could I find it? It's a song of hope, I have no hope. She sings that we are woven together, that there's hope for us being together. That life has brought us here. I cry even more, this is cruel. I want her to be her, but life hasn't brought her here. I can smell her, I can feel her, but she's just a figure of my imagination.

She is shifting position, I want her to stay. I keep my eyes closed, I concentrate on my thoughts that are bringing her here. If I can, she'll stay. She puts one of her legs over mine, sitting sideways towards me, putting her legs around me. She leans her head on my shoulder, I can feel her hair, I can smell her, it's like she's really here, but I know she's not. This is cruel, but I can't stop concentrating on her. she's here, even if it's just in my daydream. I take the pain afterwards.

She lifts her hands, stroking my face. Her hands are so soft, they make me cry harder, I wish she was here. She takes the earphones out of my ears. She calls my name. How can it seem so real? She is not here, she can't be. She left me. I can't help it, I sob, I have to let the pain out. I can't breathe, I cry so hard.

Arms are holding me, I lean into her, How can I dream all this. I put my arms around her, burying my head on her shoulder. I take this, even if it's just for a second. I feel her close again.

She is calling my name, I hear her voice as clear as daybreak. She has her hands cupping my face, she tells me to open my eyes. I can't if I do she disappears. I don't want her to.

"Charlie, look at me!" Her voice soft as silk. "I can't, you'll go away" I say out loud. I don't know why, it just seems so real that I have to vocalize. "I won't go away, I am here, look at me." She says again. It's so cruel, why should my own imagination tell me to open my eyes and make her go away? I want her to stay.

She quotes from the song I was playing; "So I face the unfamiliar and nothing's clear, Only blinding faith can carry me from her_e. _I don't know why, I don't know how, I don't know where, Baby, all I know is love"

"Charlie, I can't get over you, I think about you every day, I cry for you every night. I want to give us a chance. I face the unfamiliar, nothing is clear, but I have faith, I love you, I don't know why, or how but it doesn't matter. We have love. If you still want me?" she talks so gently, she is answering all my hopes and dreams I thought dead.

"I love you, I want you, my life is worth nothing without you." I have to say it, even though she can't hear it. Hands are lifting my head, I can feel her breath on my face, can this be real? I don't dear to look. Her lips finds mine, I open my mouth, inviting her in. I can taste her, the sweet taste that's so unique to her. I feel her tongue against mine. She set me on fire, I long only for more. I let my tongue play with hers, she sends jolts of passion racing through me. The feeling settles deep inside me, where no one but she has touched me, before her, I didn't know about that place.

I let my hands find her head, running my fingers through her hair, I can feel the texture, How can a figure of my imagination feel so real? I have never daydreamed like this, maybe I have lost my marbles, I have to ask her. "Why do you feel so real, I know you're not here, but I can feel you, smell you, taste you?"

"That's because I am here. I'm not a dream Charlie, I have come back to you, if you want me." Her voice is still so soft. "I want you, more than anything, but I know you're not here, how can you be?" I ask, not wanting the answer, because it will tell me that she is not here.

"Open your eyes Charlie, I promise you, I'm here! OK, if you're afraid I'll vanish if you look, I will leave if you don't open your eyes. So no matter what you do, you have nothing to lose!" Her voice is sterner now. She is right, she will go away whatever I do. I cry, I don't want her to go, these few minutes have been so wonderful , I don't want to lose her again.

I brace myself, I'm going to open my eyes, I just have to prepare myself of losing her again. I bend my head, I open my eyes. I can see her legs around me, I can't believe my eyes, I really have lost my marbles. She puts her hand under my chin, I can see her arm. She lifts my head, I can see her torso, her flat stomach, the curves of her breast, the collarbones where they dip together in the middle. Her neck with the soft, tender skin I love to kiss.

I can see her lips, gently curving, It always looks like there's a smile hiding in the corners, waiting to break free. I see her nose, the cute curve. I know what comes next, her eyes. Those wonderful, deep brown eyes, I feel like I disappear when I look into them. I can't look now. She is so real, but I think her eyes will show that she isn't. I look down, I see her thigh resting over mine. I want to touch it, I lift my hand, I'm scared she goes away when I touch her, but I have to.

My hand is resting on her thigh, she isn't going away. She has to be here, I don't know how, but she is here! I have to be sure, I'm scared but I lift my eyes and I find hers. I find deep wells of love looking at me, she is here! "Joey" I throw my arms around her, I sob in her arms. She cries too, I can feel her body shaking. "You are here!" I cup her face with my hands, I look at her, let my eyes rest on the features I know so well. "I love you Baby, You're here" I kiss her, she answers. I love her so much, I can barely contain it.

"I couldn't stay away any longer. Charlie you have my heart, I don't want it back. I don't know what tomorrow holds, but today, I love you, and I hold fast to that!" She caresses me, Oh, how much I have longed for her touch. I pull her closer, I pull her up on my lap, I don't want anything between us, I want her as close as possible.

I burry my head in her chest, I inhale her sent, I keep touching her to make sure she's real. She is, I cry again. She kisses the top of my head. We just sit here, embraced, holding on as if there is no tomorrow.


	2. Chapter 2

**Looking for you**

_I've waited so long now, I've wanted forever to hold you. Now you're in my arms, And I'll never let you go.  
Whatever you do, you know, I'll be standing here beside you, baby. Just like a bird that's found its way back home, I finally found a place where I belong.  
I've been looking for you since I took my first breath. And I'll be loving you, baby 'til I take my last.  
I'd like to know, What would I do without you in my life? From the moment I saw you, I knew, I was looking for you.  
Can I wake up now? Can I believe what I'm feeling? Can I be sure I wasn't dreaming it all? Baby, it's true you do something supernatural to me. Each night, I pray to God that you'll be blessed! I need you so much, baby, I confess.  
So the story goes, Together ever after. Another dream came true  
I'd like to know, What would I do without you in my life? All along, I was waiting for you. From the moment I saw you, I knew, It had to be you.  
I was looking for you. All along, I was looking for you, from the moment I saw you, I knew, I was looking for you._

"Are you really here?" I just have to be sure. I hold her so tight. I have waited for what seems like forever to hold her, now she's in my arms. "Baby, I will never let you go again, I love you!" I have to tell her, I feel like I have come home.

"I am really here! I couldn't stay away any longer, I just love you too much. I belong with you!" She stares into my eyes, I stare back, she is so beautiful. Her eyes draws me in, I want to dive into them, discover new things about her. My life is worth living again. Still it feels like she's a dream, what If I wake up? "Can I wake up now? Can I believe that you're here? I'm not dreaming?" I have to be sure, if I wake up and find her gone, I would die.

"I'm so sorry for everything, I'm such an ass. I hurt you so bad, Baby, forgive me!" I can't live without her. she is the one for me, I just know. "I have been looking for you my whole life, I found you and I almost lost you. You're here now, I will never let you go. Whatever happens baby, I'll be here for you. I have made mistakes, but from the moment I saw you I knew… I need you! "I kiss her again. I dreamt about it so many times, thinking that I would never taste her lips again. She willingly let me explore her mouth, I let my tongue enter, searching, tasting, she taste incredibly, I didn't know that anyone could taste so good.

"Charlie, honey, from the very beginning I knew, it had to be you. It feels like I have been lost, and now I'm home. I don't know what you do to me, it has to be something supernatural, I'm tied to you, I can't leave you." She holds me so hard that I can hardly breath, I don't mind, I hold her just as hard. I will not let her go again."I'm here for you Baby, whatever happens!"

**Touch**_  
There's a fire in the sky, the stars are burning. Like this passion tonight, slowly stirring you and I.  
A way we've never known, now we're here alone.  
You're the one in my life, and nothing matters more to me on this night than learning how to love you 'til the morning light, Baby, you and I.  
Hold me close, feel me breathe, touch my heart, set it free and love will lead us. Lay me down, lift me up, feel the power every time we touch. Don't we wait all our lives for such a moment?  
Soul to soul, eye to eye, when all our colors run into one, 'til there's no dividing line between you and I.  
Moon on the water, pulling the tide, love is an ocean, love washes over, over you and I as we drift on the sea of desire.  
I've waited all my life for this moment, For this. For this…_

I took her home. She was received with open arms. I'm so happy, I still have a hard time believing she is her. I have to touch her, feel her, to make sure I'm not dreaming. The sensation she creates when she touches me tells me that she is very much here. I want her, I can hardly contain myself. I practically devour her with my eyes. I want to be with her, feel the power when we touch.

I can wait, she is here, and we have time. It's just that I can't keep my eyes of her. Ruby and Leah probably thinks I've lost it, I don't care, I've found it! I got her back, I know she's the one for me. It's so good to see her sitting at the kitchen table again, she belongs here, with me.

I know Ruby loves her, and Leah does too, she practically begged her to come and stay when I took her here. Not that Leah would have any choice, she stays with me! But it's good to know she is welcome here.

The night is falling, I can't think about anything but taking her to my bed, learning to love her again. We have eaten together, enjoyed a superb meal served by Leah. I don't want to share her any longer. "I think I'm going to bed, you coming?" I ask her, I don't care what Leah an Ruby thinks. I know what they think, and they are absolutely right.

She jumps up so fast that she almost knocks over the table. I have to smile, I'm not the only one longing to be alone. She tells the other goodnight, giving them a hug while I watch. I have to smile, she really does belong here.

The moon is shining through the window, seeing her in that light, she is gorgeous. I can't keep away from her any longer. She actually finds me first, I welcome her with open arms. Feeling her body against mine sets me on fire. She hasn't even touched me yet, and I'm burning with desire. I find her lips, invading her mouth. I can tell by her reaction, she is feeling the heat just as I am.

"Charlie, I need you, I have never felt such passion!" She whispers into my mouth, her words adding fuel to my fire. I pull her shirt off, I want her naked skin, I want to let my hands caress her, feeling her. She unbuttons my shirt, her hands on my skin is almost too much. Oh, I have missed this. I have never felt so strong before. I have never felt the way she makes me feel. The touch of her fingers, her lips on my body.

"you're the one in my life, you make me feel things I have never felt before. Baby I want to learn to love you until daybreak." I whisper, pulling her closer. I remove the rest of her garments, I want to feel all of her. She lets her hand find the front of my shorts, she unbuttons them, dropping to the floor. The rest follow the same way.

I stand, holding her, arms around her. I don't want anything between us, I just want to feel her against me.

"Hold me tight, feel me breath, hear my heart beat. It beats for you. Touch my heart, set it free. Lay me down, lift me up, feel the power every time we touch!" I want her. She follows my instructions, she lets love guide her. She touches my heart with the gentle caressing of my body. She really loves me, all she wants is to be good to me.

She cares only about me, I can feel it. There is nothing demanding about her, no selfish actions to satisfy herself. She wants to satisfy me. I feel tears running down my cheek. How can this be possible? She put me on fire like I have never been before. She lays me down on the bed, stretching out on top of me. I love to feel her weight pressing me down, it feels so good, so safe. She lets her hand find its way between us, I long for her touch, I want to feel her. Her fingers find their way. I meet them. The sensation she creates blows my mind. She lifts me up to levels I have never reached before.

She rests on top off me, my breathing is still labored, she makes me fly. I want to give her the same pleasure she gives me. "I want to learn to love you like you deserve, I want to love you till the day breaks. I want to take you diving in the sea of love. Let's drift on the sea of desire.

I roll her under me, it's my turn to touch her heart, let her feel the power of our touch, lifting her up. I caress her, letting my hands rediscover her curves. I've missed her so much, touching her relights the fire in me. I let my hand find a long missed path. I love her femininity, I never knew that I could, but I do. I kiss her, she opens her eyes and stares into mine, none of us able to look away. I can see the fire my hand light in her. It's amazing, knowing that I have such an effect on her. Her eyes are dark with desire, she can hardly breath, It makes me feel good. I can give her this. I feel her hand on me again. We still can't take our eyes of each other. The dividing line between our bodies disappears, we are one. I can see behind her eyes, this is more than skin on skin. We are soul to soul, eye to eye as all our colors run into one.

**Simple things**

_Wake up baby look around, birds singing ,oh that sound reminds me of a line from Unchained Melody.  
Feel like I'm a little girl, best thing in the whole wide world is I can see the makings of a memory.  
I remember how it used to be, well I'm still dreaming...  
Cause I dream of simple things I can believe in, like the feeling this day brings. True love and the miracle of forgiving, I believe in simple things.  
Ain't nothing like a sunny day, chit-chat at a street café. Just paint the picture, baby where you wanna be.  
Take a walk, take a ride, So far, you and I don't need a plan, But we can share this revelry.  
I remember how I used to want it all, funny now the big things seem so small.  
I dream of simple things I can believe in Like the feeling this day brings. True love and the miracle of forgiving, I believe in simple things.  
Through all the days, The blues, the greys, a ray of light keeps shining..._

I look at her sleeping in my bed. I haven't slept at all, I might be stupid, but what if I fall asleep and she's gone when I wake up? Besides, I love to watch her sleep, she is so beautiful. I don't want to leave her, so as soon it is late enough I call in to work with a family emergency. Well, it is, I have an urgent need to be with her.

I feel like a little girl on Christmas day, having a wonderful gift waiting for me. I love her! As I've watch her sleep, I can see that she dreams, and it's not good dreams. I tried to wake her, but it seemed like the dream let her go, and she became peaceful again. I wonder what it was about. Probably Robbo, but I have a feeling there's more. I just don't know what. Hopefully I can find out. Whatever it is, she can't carry it alone, and I want to carry it with her.

The birds starts to sing! What a wonderful sound. It reminds me of a song I've heard, It makes me smile, I truly feel like a little girl, exited about a new day, and what it will bring. I can't stand it any longer, I have to wake her up. See her eyes again, hear her voice. I want to make her happy.

I remember the days we had together before I ruined everything. We were so happy, we had so much fun. We played, we laughed, we cried. I'm hoping we can get it back. No, I want it better. No insecurities, no worrying about what people will say. I was so stupid, those things doesn't matter, they don't! At least that's one thing I have learned.

"Wake up Baby, hear the birds sing! Isn't it a wonderful morning?" I lean over her and kiss her. She smiles against my lips, "Now, this is the way to wake up!" She kisses me back. "What do you want to do today? I want to make this perfect for you! Do you want to go and have breakfast somewhere, just lazily chat the hours away? Or maybe we should go for a walk, or take the car. We could go to the countryside…" She interrupts me with another kiss.

"We don't need a plan, but I would love to have breakfast with you, maybe we could go to the diner? We could sit outside in the beautiful weather and just take it from there!" She smiles at me. The sight warms my heart, I want us to make memories, memories of a perfect day with the one that I love.

We make our way to the diner, and lo and behold, there's Watson getting herself some take away. I'm busted. She makes her way over to us, I feel my cheeks burning. It's not a good look for a senior constable to be caught lying to get out of work.

"So this is your family emergency?" She looks at me with her eyebrows lifted. What can I say?

"I understand, Have a nice day, but maybe you should go somewhere else after your breakfast." She smiles at me, I could kiss her there and then for being so understanding. No, I couldn't kiss her, the only one I want to kiss is Joey.

------

"Charlie, honey" She brings me back from my blissful state, walking in beautiful surroundings, holding her hand.

"Like I said yesterday, I don't know anything except the fact that I love you. I put my faith in you. I just want to tell you that I forgive you!" She stops, take both my hands and look deep into my eyes. I drown in hers. What a precious gift she has given me. She kisses me, I kiss her back, I try to put all my feelings into it, telling her that I won't throw her gift away. I hope she can feel it.

"I believe in simple things, and for me it is simple, I love you!" She says into my mouth, Tears starts running down my cheeks again. I have become a pretty skilled crier, but this time my tears are tears of joy. What a miracle, the thing I have prayed for, longed for, wanted to hear. Now she tells me: I forgive you, how can I ever want anything more?

I want to keep the feeling of today with me, this is what I believe in, the feeling this day brings,true love and the miracle of forgiving.


	3. Chapter 3

**Baby baby**

_Baby, baby, I'm taken with the notion, to love you with the sweetest of devotion.  
Baby, baby, my tender love will flow from the bluest sky to the deepest ocean.  
Stop for a minute Baby, I'm so glad you're mine, yeah You're mine.  
Baby, baby, the stars are shining for you, and just like me I'm sure that they adore you.  
Baby, baby, go walking through the forest, the birds above are singing you a chorus.  
Stop for a minute Baby, they're so glad you're mine. And ever since the day you put my heart in motion, Baby I realize that there's just no getting over you.  
Baby, baby, in any kind of weather, I'm here for you always and forever.  
Baby, baby, No muscle man could sever my love for you is true, and it will never stop for a minute, Baby, I'm so glad you're mine. And ever since the day you put my heart in motion,  
Baby I realize that there's just no getting over you.  
Baby, baby, Always and forever. Here for you baby, so glad you're mine  
When I think about you it makes me smile, Baby, baby be mine  
Don't stop giving love, Don't stop, no  
Baby I'm so glad that you're mine. When I think about you it makes me smile._

I'm the luckiest person walking on the face of the earth. I have my love with me. The days since she came back to me has been out of this world. We have talked about us, it hasn't been easy, but it was necessary. I love her even more, I want to know all about her. I know there's something she holds back, I want her to open up. I want her to know that no matter what, I'm here for her, always and forever. Nothing can sever my love for her.

I don't care what people say any more, it was stupid of me to care at all. Besides, people isn't making a very big deal of it. Some are of course, but not those who matters to me. I haven't told Dad and Morag yet, I have to, I have arranged for Morag to be her layer, I want my Baby to have the best. Morag is, there's no way around it, and this will come out in the trail, so I have to tell them first.

I'm actually looking forward to it. I don't know how they will react, but I want the whole world to know that I love her.

"Baby, I love you so much, you know the whole creation is made for you? The stars are shining for you, the birds sings for you. They are so glad that you're mine!" I stop her in our tracks along the beach, I kiss her, I can't even go five minutes without touching her.

Having to go to work is agony, because I can't see her for eight hours, or I'm not supposed to, but fortunately she can't stay away from me either, so she drops by quite frequently. I have never seen my office as a good place to make out, but behind closed doors, it' actually proving to be quite a nice place, because she's there.

"Charlie" I love the way she says my name."I can't begin to describe how happy I am with you. You make the world go away, you're embrace makes me feel safe. I don't have to worry about anything, because you protect me. I love you, from the first time I saw you, you touched me. When you found me in the storage room, I was so ashamed. I had seen you before, I had seen you on the wharf, you were breathtaking. I even dreamt about you. But then, when you was standing behind me in that small room, I could feel the warmth of your body, all I could think was how disgusted I had to make you feel. You touched me, it scared me so bad, I felt so dirty, so used, I couldn't stand your touch, I thought you had to sense it." She cries, I pull her towards me, putting her head on my shoulder. I can feel her body shake. I want to remove all the bad feelings.

"I wasn't disgusted with you, I just wanted to hold you, protect you. You turned a light on in me, a light I didn't know I had. I have thought about it, and I think I fell in love with you that day, even though I didn't know it at the time." I'm so glad that I can hold her now. That I can comfort her, letting her know I'm here.

"Ever since that day, my heart belonged to you. I love you, my love reaches from the sky to the bottom of the deepest ocean. I'm so glad you're mine, there's just is no getting over you!" I dry her tears of with my thumbs, gently I let my lips meet hers. I love her, like she loves me.

**Like I love you**

_Why do lovers drift apart? How does love fade away? When do pieces of a broken heart mend again?  
You've been crying in the dark, and you've been feeling alone, Don't be scared of what you'll find When you turn the light on.  
Ain't nobody gonna say goodbye, ain't nobody gonna walk away.  
This time, baby, I'm learning how to love you. Ain't nobody gonna make you cry. Ain't nobody ever really tried to love, Like I love you!  
What sad memory of yesterday? What terrible scar keeps you gathering pieces of your shattered heart? There was once upon a time when hope was living within, I know there will come a time  
when you can believe again.  
How long have you been feeling lost and lonely? How long have you been sad and blue?  
This time, baby, I'm learning how to love you. Ain't nobody gonna make you cry, ain't nobody ever really tried to love Like I love you!  
Let me love you, like I love you!_

I'm laying in bed, trying to calm her down. She had a nightmare, I suspect it was about Robbo, but she hasn't told me. She cries, she doesn't make a sound, but I can feel warm tears on my skin. This isn't the first time, and it breaks my heart. The dreams has become more frequent, maybe because she feels safe, and lets her guards down?

In her dreams she is begging someone to stop, begging not to be hurt. My heart shatters when I hear her. I want to take it all away. I want that time machine to take us back to before Robbo raped her, to a time where she was happy.

I'm wondering tough, was there a time when she was happy? I mean really happy? She doesn't tell me anything about her childhood. I tell stories from mine, I try to get her to share too, but she won't, she just avoid the question, saying that all that matters is me.

She reaches for the light switch, turning it on, I can see the panic in her face. She looks at me, let her hands run over my face, as if she wants to confirm that it is me. Who is she afraid to see? She buries her nose in my neck, inhaling my sent, she let her mouth taste my skin, but there's no passion in it. It's like she want to remove the smell and taste of someone else. I wish she would talk to me!

"Baby, you're crying in the dark, don't be scared of what you'll find when you turn the light on!" I make my voice soft and gentle, I want to reach her, love her. "What has happened to you, what terrible memories? What sad memory of yesterday? What terrible scar keeps you gathering pieces of your shattered heart? Baby, talk to me!" I'm desperate to reach her, maybe she's afraid that I'll be disgusted with her, as she thought I was that day in the storage room, maybe she's afraid that her terrible scars will make me leave her?

"How long have you been feeling lost and lonely? Why are you so scared? There's no one here that will make you cry, no one will go away, there's no one here to hurt you!  
This time, baby, I'm learning how to love you. I will not walk away, I won't say goodbye, ain't nobody ever really loved you like I love you!" I gently rock her, I hold her close, I want her to confide in me. I can feel her slip back into sleep, I'm just holding her. One day she will talk to me.

It's daylight, I have her in my arms, she's sleeping peacefully, all the terrors of the night has left her. I need her to talk to me. It hurts so much when I'm not able to reach her. I don't want her to carry the burden alone. I love her, she loves me. We owe to carry each other.

The sun hits her face, she wakes up, she blinks a few times. For a short second I can see fear in her eyes, it's over so quick that I wonder if I saw right. I have to ask her again. "you cried in the night, Baby, what's going on? You can talk to me, I won't leave you. You often cry at night, what has happened to you, what scars do you carry that won't let you mend your heart? Baby, let me be here for you!" I'm pleading with her. I can see tears forming in her eyes again.

"you will hate me if I tell you, you will never want to touch me again!" Tears are streaming down her face.

"I won't Baby, I'm here for you, I won't go away. Let me love you like I love you." I hold her tight. I can barely hear what she said, I lifted her head from its hiding place, buried in my chest. I ask her to repeat.

"Ask me" She says.


	4. Chapter 4

**Ask me**

_I see her as a little girl hiding in her room, she takes another bath and she sprays her momma's perfume to try to wipe away the scent he left behind, But it haunts her mind.  
You see she's his little rag, nothing more than just a waif, and he's mopping up his need, she is tired and afraid. Maybe she'll find a way through these awful years to disappear.  
Ask me if I think there's a God up in the heaven. Where did he go in the middle of her shame?  
Ask me if I think there's a God up in the heavens. I see no mercy and no one down here's naming names, nobody's naming names.  
Now she's looking in the mirror at a lovely woman face, no more frightened little girl, like she's gone without a trace. Still she leaves the light burning in the hall, It's hard to sleep at all.  
Still she crawls up in her bed acting quiet as a mouse. Deep inside she's listening for a creaking in the house. But no one's left to harm her, she's finally safe and sound…_

I can't believe what I'm hearing. Every word she says cause my heart to break. How can anyone do that to a little, innocent child? I cry, I cry for her. She asked me not to touch her while she told me. I'm sitting on the bed, she is sitting on a chair, facing away from me. I can see her face in the mirror. She is so beautiful.

I imagine what she would look like when she was a kid. She had to be incredible cute. She tells me about her father, what he did to her. I wish I could kill him, but he's already dead. I wish I could pay hell a visit and make him pay, again and again.

I can see her body shiver as she tells me what he did at night. She relives everything. All I want to do is gather her in my arms, hold her and comfort her. I don't want to interrupt, she needs to get it out. I know she's scared, but she's on a role, she can't stop.

I don't want to hear any more of it. I want to put my fingers in my ears and scream. I want it not to be true. I can't comprehend what she tells me. I love her, and hearing that someone has molested the person I love most, I can't begin to describe how that feels.

I listen, I promised her I would be here for her, no matter what. I'm not going back on my word. If it hurts me, how much more does it hurt her?

"And then my mother left, I couldn't believe that she would leave me there… I guess she was fed up with the abuse, the drinking, him hitting her. She left me there…" She is sobbing so hard that she can hardly speak. I don't care what she said before, I have to hold her. I kneel down on the floor in front of her. I gently remove the hands she is covering her face with. I want her to see that I love her.

I look into her eyes, I can see her as a little girl, hiding in her room, scared, listening for footstep… I can hardly see her face in front of me, my eyes are flooded with tears. I cup her face with my hands. I let my lips just barely brush over hers. I pull her close to me. I can feel her arms around my neck, she cries on my shoulder. I hold her, I let my hand stroke her back. I try to comfort her with all that is in me.

She is shivering violently, past hurt run through her body. She holds on to me as if I'm her lifeline. I want to be her lifeline. I want to bring her happiness and life.

She lifts her head, looking at me. "There has to be something wrong with me." Her lower lip is shivering. I can see her as a girl with that lip shivering after… I can't finish the thought.

"Baby, you know there's nothing wrong with you. Your father was a sick and cruel man. There was something wrong with him. Joey, you are perfect, innocent, it's not your fault!"

She leans in to me, "I'm so ashamed of everything. I still have trouble sleeping, I will listen for footsteps…and then Robbo, it brought everything back to life." she hides her face. I understand so much more now. Why she was so ashamed when she told me about Robbo, why she was so scared of her brother, why she was scared that I would judge her. Why she was so afraid that I would be disgusted with her, that I wouldn't want to touch her again.

I want to touch her again. I want to hold her, comfort her. It is difficult tough, to know that the body of the woman I love has been used as a rag. She has such a beautiful body, and thinking of her as a little girl… It makes me sick, I really have to battle not to throw up, it's not exactly what she needs right now.

I'm tired, she is too, I can tell. I grab her hands, rise her up and guides her to the bed. We lay down, spooning. I lay behind her, I have one arm under her head, the other one across her ribcage. I hold her, trying to comfort her. I keep whispering in her ear that I love her. I do, I love her so much, I don't think anyone has come up with words grand enough to explain it.

We lay like this for a long time, I have no comprehension of how long, it doesn't matter. I can't even remember if I'm supposed to be at work or not, I don't even care. All that matters is here, in my arms.

"You don't hate me?" She ask with such softness. "Oh, Baby, I don't, I love you, nothing is going to change that!" I reassure her. Slowly she turns to face me. "Do you still want to be with me?" "Of course I want to be with you, you're mine, I love all off you!" I lift her head and give her a kiss, I try to be gentle and careful. This is not the time for making love, but I want her to know that I still love her, I still want her.

She puts her arm around me, placing her leg over my waist, pulling me as close as possible. I hold her tight, wanting her to be as close as possible. We fall asleep like that. Holding each other, finding comfort and peace.


	5. Chapter 5

**Thank you for the reviews!!

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**Say once more**

_Let me say once more that I love you, let me say one time, maybe two, that I love the way that you love me, and I wish I knew more of you. Tell me that time can't erase this look of love on your face. Let me say once more that I need you, one more time or just maybe two. Oh, my life will always be richer for the time I've spent here with you. Tell me that time won't erase the way that my heart sees your face._

_I call your name, you look my way, it's clear you trust each word I say. When life is long and problems come, you'll always be my only one. So now we're standing face to face, and with one look my eyes embrace you. Squeeze away each haunting fear, and say the words I long to hear._

_Let me say once more that I love you, one more time or just maybe two, that I love the way that you love me, and I want to know more of you. I call your name, you look my way, I love you. It's clear you trust each word I say.  
When life is long and problems come, You'll always be my only one. So now we're standing face to face, oh, I need you. And with one look my eyes embrace you. I want you. Squeeze away each haunting fear, more and more and more. And say the words I long to hear._

I have never cared so little about my job. I used to be real focused, I wanted to excel in my job, climb the degrees, become the ultimate super cop. I don't care about my career any longer. I guess a time will come when I do again. My job is to bring justice, but I can't bring Justice to my Baby. So I talked to Rachel and she gave me a sick leave in order for me to be with Joey, that's all I want.

Her father is dead, there's no one to punish. If he wasn't, I would kill him with my own bare hands.

I just pray that my love is enough. We are walking on the beach, we have done that for the past week, since the day she told me about her father. It seems to give her peace. Also the date for the court case has been set, it's in a week. I know she's worried. It's so hard for her. I just need her to know that I'm here for her, that I love her, she will always be my only one.

I stop her, grab a hold of her waist, turn her so that she's facing me. I pull her close, we stand hip to hip. I lean my upper body a little bit back, so I can see her eyes. "I just have to tell you that I love you, I want to say it again and again. I love the way you love me. Baby, I want to know everything about you, each little thought that you carry. No matter what we have to face, you will always be my only one. I need you, I want you, I want to remove all haunting fear in you. I love you!" I lean in and give her a kiss. She opens hers and invites me in.

I don't care that we are in the middle of a public beach, I want her, and she wants me. If anyone wants to look, then go ahead. All that matters is the beautiful woman I have in my arms. I kiss her deep, our tongues are dancing, I love the feeling she gives me.

She pulls me closer, her hands run up and down my back. I can feel the passion rise in her. It echoes my own. "You want me!" She says, almost surprised. We haven't been intimate since she told me. I didn't want to push her, I wanted her to take the initiative when she was ready. It was traumatic to tell me, it was traumatic to hear.

"Of course I want you, I love you, your body, your touch. I just wanted to wait until you were ready to be with me again. There's no rush, we have all the time in the world!" I smile at her, letting my hands run through her hair.

"I wasn't sure if you wanted to be with me again, I mean, you said you wanted, but it was hard to believe…"She has tears in her eyes. "And then it was hard because telling you made everything so real again, I guess I just need time… It was good though, to tell you. I don't have to hide anything from you. I don't have to be afraid that you reject me if you find out. You know, and you still love me." She places her hands on my cheeks."I Love you Charlie Buckton, I love the way you love me. I want you, I need you, I want to be with you, make love to you!" She finds my lips. My heart overflows with emotions.

She kisses me, let her tongue caress my lips, I catch it with my own, inviting her to play. Each touch builds up the fire inside me. She is burning hot, I can feel the heat through her clothes, she moves against me, I can hardly control myself. "Let's go home!" she whisper in my ear.

**After the fire**

_After the fire is over, after the ashes cool, after the smoke has blown away ,I will be here for you.  
After the stillness finds you, after the winds of change. All that is good and true between us, this will remain the same  
Slowly...slowly, we turn the page of life. Growing...knowing. It comes at quite a price  
After your time of wandering along this lonely road., there will be many voices calling. Mine will say: "Welcome home"_

_Slowly...slowly, we turn the page of life. Growing...knowing. It comes at quite a price._

I thought I had experienced the highest level of pain a person could experience. I was so wrong. I have her sleeping in my arms I'm not able to sleep, I hurt so much. We were in court today. It was horrible. I could strangle Robbo's layer, he was so hard on her. He tore down everything that we have build up, he made it sound like it was her fault.

I hate Robbo so intensely, any sentence he gets is not hard enough. He should pay for the rest of his life for what he done to her.

This is so hard, I never dreamt that the price of getting justice would be so high. I don't know if I would have pushed so hard on her to press charges if I knew… But I know that the price for not doing it would be so much higher. It hurts now, but it will pass. We will get through this fire, it will die down, the ashes cool, and the smoke will blow away.

I know, but my heart is aching, and then I think about her heart, it has to ache so much more.

The only reason she is not crying now is because she's sleeping, she cried herself to sleep. All I could do was to reassure her that I'm here for her. I am, I will always be. When all this is over, she will find that we haven't changed. I just want her to come home, getting back from the lonely journey she's on, walking through hurts and scars.

I want to go with her, ease her burden. In a way I guess I am, by being here, holding her. I just know it's not enough. What if she gets lost in there, so entangled in memories that she can't find her way back to me?

It hurts so bad to see her go through this. I thought I had experienced all levels of heartache, but see her go through this, not being able to follow her steps through her memories, it has brought me to a whole new level of pain, I'm hurting for her.

I am here. I won't let her go, when all this has blown over, when she comes back, She'll find me here for her.

I know it will take time, but we'll get there. Slowly we will put this behind us, turning the page of life, starting on a new chapter together.


	6. Chapter 6

**Leave it all behind**

_I took a drive along the west bank of the shore. I thought of what you said, then I thought some more. You say your life is all but chiseled out in stone, and all you want is just a taste of the unknown.  
Think it was yesterday I called you on the phone, you say you need a change, I recognize the tone,  
Buy me a ticket please, to anywhere I'll go, I'm not saying what is right or what is wrong, I'm just thinking you've been hanging here too long.  
So, why don't we, just up and leave it all behind? Maybe a change would ease your mind, for a time, leave it all behind.  
What I really want to do is see you smile, Hear you talk and let me listen for a while, there's too much going on to keep it all inside, You try to whisper, but you start to scream and shout. What you need is just a place to let it out._

I just needed a break. What she said hurt me, but I know she said it just because she' s so drained. I just need to clear my mind for a second. The past few weeks has been really difficult. After the court case she has closed up. I try to talk to her, but she doesn't listen, or she can't. Her body is here with me, but her mind is still walking lonely paths.

I believe the need she has for something new, to taste the unknown is a reflection of what's going on inside. I know she wants to leave it all behind, move forward, but it's so hard for her.

I think we need to get away together, I don't care where, just some place where no one knows us, where we can have some peace and quiet. Where she can talk to me.

There's so much going on inside of her. I wish I could go there with her, I could if she just would talk to me. Maybe we should have left a long time ago, maybe that would ease her mind. There's so many things screaming for her attention here. Even Brett, her ass of a brother has been hassling her.

He was there at the trail, and he wasn't there to support her. He scolded her up and down for reviling she is gay. He has been over to our house to, showing up on the doorstep drunk, scaring the living daylight out of her. I'm really considering taking out an AVO on him, but technically he hasn't harmed her, so… I just think we have been hanging here too long.

I just want to be here for her. I want to see her smile again, I want to hear her talk to me. Unload everything she carries, she doesn't have to do it on her own, it's too much going on to keep it all inside. I'm here, ready to unload her burden.

She has tried to talk to me, she tries, but she end up screaming and shouting. I try to calm her down, but when she does, she can't talk. She just clings to me, I'm happy to hold her. I would hold her all day if she needs me to, but she needs to talk.

I'm heading back home. I'm going to take her away from here, give us time together.

She is laying in my bed, I just have to stop and watch her. She is so beautiful, her long dark hair fanning out, her slender body, the lovely curve of her butt, makes me just want to kiss her. I really miss her. I'll do anything to have her back. I don't only want her body, I want her soul too. She is gorgeous on the outside, but that's nothing compared with her inside. She is so caring, loving, gentle, fun… she always make me laugh… I could go on and on forever. I love her so much, everything about her.

I sit down on the bed beside her, she turns and look at me. "Let us just get up and leave, Baby" I stroke her hair. "I know you need some change, I think we should just get away, somewhere we can be alone. I think a change would ease your mind. Let's just leave all this for a while."

"You want to go away with me?" She ask me, I do, I want to go away with her, I nod. "Baby, I want to see you smile again, I want to hear you talk, I want you to let me listen, you can't keep everything inside, it's too much going on, and I want to ease your burden!" I lay down beside her, holding her. "I think it would do us both good. When we try to talk now, you try to whisper, but all you do is scream and shout. You need a place to let it all out!"

She is looking at me, I know I'm right. She tries to get out of my grip. I won't let her. She has to deal with this. "I'm not letting you go Baby, you can't run from me. I have you, I won't let you go. I have the strength to carry you, if you just let me!" Slowly she relax in my arms, she starts to cry. "I want to go with you, "she says in between heavy sobs. "I need to get out of here!"


	7. Chapter 7

**Thank you for your reviews!**

**Good for me**

_You like to dance and listen to the music, I like to sing with the band. You like your hands splashing in the ocean, Well I like my feet on the sand. Does anybody have it any better? Isn't it easy to see just how well we fit together?  
When I start to sing the blues, you pull out my dancing shoes, I think you are so good for me.  
You get brave when I get shy, just another reason why I think you are so good for me.  
You like to drive like Mario Andretti, I like it taking my time. But let me say wherever you are going  
You know it suits me just fine. Does anybody have it any better? Isn't it easy to see just how well we fit together?_

I can't keep my eyes of my girl. Going away was the best idea I could ever have. It has done us both wonders. Now we are lying on our backs on a lone pier, no one's here. She has a hand and a foot dangling in the water. I can't help but role over and kiss her.

We have been through some pretty rough patches. It has been incredible difficult, to hear what she has gone through, to hear what Robbo made her feel like. I have cried so much, I have to be the most skilled crier in the world, it feels like I know every aspect of crying. From just a lonely tear trickling down my check, to bursting the floodgates. I have done it all.

I hurt so much on her behalf, but I'm happy that I can share her burdens, I can carry it.

We have been away for three weeks. It's been so good for her. She has talked to me, let me in on all her fears and worries. She took me on a journey on the paths she has walked alone. She is not alone there anymore. She has found me here for her, she knows I will never let her go, I won't.

We have worked through many issues. We truly have gotten a new start. We have discovered more of our differences and equalities, we have also found that those are the things that make us fit so well together. We complete each other.

We have a remarkable capability to lift each other up. When she is blue, I can be there, support her and lift her up. When I'm sad, she comes and pick me up. I have found so many times that it's so much easier to pull down than to lift up. I think that our ability to lift each other is a true gift.

I support myself on my elbow, I just have to look at her. I'm still amazed that this can be. I'm so glad that we have talked, that she has opened up to me, that she trust me. We get to know each other better every day, and the more I get to know her, the more I love her.

Can anybody have it any better? This is true love, I know it. I love her for all the years she wasn't loved, I love her for all the scars. I love her for everything she is to me. I love the way that she loves me, the way she puts her trust in me. I can't believe that I once tossed that trust in the garbage, like it meant nothing to me. I was so selfish that day. I threw away something more precious than… than everything else. Nothing compares to the value of trust and love.

She makes me laugh. We have driven my car on this trip, I like to take it nice, not breaking any speed limits or anything. I mean, I kind of have to, I'm a cop, it wouldn't look good if I was caught speeding.

She on the other hand, she loves speed, she's a good driver, but she drives FAST. I know I should stop her, but she makes me laugh. She isn't dangerous on the road though, she only press the pedal when we're on lone roads in the bush. Maybe she should become a rally driver.

I can see a smile playing on her lips, maybe she thinks about speeding. I giggle, she opens her eyes and look at me."Baby, you look happy, what are you thinking about?" I let my hand caress her face.

She grabs my hand and kiss it, it tingles, sending little rays of fire into my body. "I think about you, how good you are for me, to me. I think about how you make me feel good when I'm down. I think about how brave you are when I get shy. I think about how well we fit together," She props herself up on the elbow, facing me, giving me that cheeky grin of hers,"in more than one way" She kisses me.

I kiss her back, I can never resist her lips. She taste so good, her tongue on mine send jolt of passion racing through me. I can feel her passion too, I never get tired of it. To know that I make her feel that way is amazing, it makes me feel so good.

She place a wet, cold hand on my back, the one she had dangling in the water, it gives me goosebumps. She drags me down on top of her. I love feeling her body under me, feel her curves, her softness. She lets her hand find their way under my shirt, letting them find parts of me that long for her touch, I can't help but vocalize the feeling she gives me when she lets her hands caress me.

I keep kissing her, I want to show her how much I love her. There's no one here, and we just have to have each other. She lets her hands find their way to my butt, pulling me close to her, moving against me. She makes the little sounds that I love to hear. She lets her hand move around, I welcome her, I want her.

I let my own hands explore her body, finding my way to the most intimate place on her. Our bodies move to the beat of an inner rhythm. Taking us far away from this place.


	8. Chapter 8

**Thanks for the reviews, have to give a major mush alert for this chap. Enjoy:)**

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**Every heartbeat**

_(I have to confess that I changed one word in the lyrics, to make it fit. I exchanged boy with girl.)_

_Hear me speak what's on my mind! let me give this testimony, reaffirm that you will find that you are my one and only! No exception to this rule, I'm simple, but I'm no fool! I've got a witness happy to say, Every hour, every day ! Every heartbeat bears your name, loud and clear, they stake my claim! Ask anyone, and they'll tell you it's true, and every heartbeat belongs to you! _

_Classic case of girl meets girl, moving in the same direction. You're not asking for the world,  
I'm not asking for perfection. Just a love that's well-designed for passing the test of time  
I'm here to tell you, I'm here to stay, Every hour, every day !_

_Yeah, sure; maybe I'm on the edge, but I love you, baby; and, like I said, I'm here to tell you, I'm here to stay! Every hour, every day!_

I'm so excited! I'm getting ready for tonight, it's my baby's birthday, and I have something special for her. I decided to wear the dress I had on when I went on that stupid date with Hugo when I was so afraid of what I was feeling that I had to flaunt my heterosexuality, to try to convince myself I was straight. I can't believe how stupid I was. Besides, all I could talk about that night was Joey. Poor Hugo, he was bored witless. But you know, what your heart is filled with, the mouth overflows with…

I just can't forget the expression in her face when she saw me that night. She was mesmerized, her jaw dropped and all she could utter was "Wow" so I want to be "wow" for her this time. We are having a party at the Surfclub, it's kind of a surprise, she thinks it's just the two of us, but I have invited one or two more.

No, not true, I have invited all our friends. I want to tell her that I love her and want to be with her for the rest of my life, and I want to do it in front of everyone. We started our relationship with me being so scared that anyone would find out. That night in the car, she asked if I was embarrassed to be with her. I said no, but in a way I was, because she was a woman.

One thing I'm sure of now, I'm not embarrassed! I love her, and I'm going to tell the world. I inherited my mother's engagement ring, and I want to give it to Joey. I want to be with her for the rest of my life and I want to give her a token on that.

I let my eyes wander around the room, I love the place we have together. It was good to stay with Leah, but it's really nice to have a place on our own together with Ruby. We are a family now, I like it!

----

I'm waiting for her to come, everyone else is here, except from Leah. I feel my heart beat, I'm a little nervous, I want this to be perfect for my Baby.

Leah's car pulls up, good, that means everybody except…

I can't believe my eyes, I have to be dreaming. Maybe I'm still on that pier, when she came back. Maybe I lost my marbles, and I've been dreaming this whole time, because what my eyes are looking at is not from this world!

My jaw has dropped, I have no control over it, I can't get it up. Soon I probably start to drool. She is so gorgeous. I have never seen her like this. She is always beautiful, whether she has just come from the boat, been out on a jog, down on the floor playing with VJ, or in the morning when she has just woken up. Specially the last. I love to watch her wake up, see the smile spreading across her face when she sees me. The first kiss she gives me, she is all soft and warm.

Now, I mean… wow, just wow…I wanted to be "wow "for her, but man has she out conquered me. She's wearing a red dress, well if I can call it that, it's so little of it…it suits her perfectly. The neckline reaches too her knees…of course not, but it's low, I mean it's half way down to her bellybutton… I can't think…

It ends high on her thigh, I feel like a horny teenager, I just want to run over, kiss her, let my lips follow the neckline, let my hand caress her thigh… oh my God, she makes me hot. I can't move though that's probably a good thing, it would make some headlines if I could…

I look at her face, to my amazement I see the exact reflection of my expression, She looks at me as if I'm an alien or something. I just have to laugh at the look on her face. Her jaw is hanging just as open as mine is. I finally get control over mine. I just stare at her, I can't take my eyes of her. It feels like she has a gravity field, she is pulling me in, and I can't resist.

I don't know how, but somehow my feet has brought me close to her. I have to ask her, "Am I dreaming? Am I still sitting on that pier, longing for you, daydreaming that you're here?" this just feels so out of this world. I feel like my bubble might burst any minute.

She takes my hands lift them up between us, it reminds me of the day on the boat when I realized I loved her. She caresses them, I look in her eyes, a smile is playing in them. "I'm not running away now," I whisper.

I close the gap between us, finding her lips, I put my hands on her neck, gently caressing the soft skin with my thumbs. Her hands rest on my wrist for a second before she let her hands entwine in my hair. We let tongues play with each other's. I explore her mouth as if it is the first time I kiss her. She sets me on fire. Every touch of her tongue sends heat to that place deep inside of me that belong only to her.

She moans into my mouth, she presses her body closer to mine. She lets her hand run down my bare shoulder and arm. It feels so good that it almost hurts. She run her hand up again, following the shape of my collarbone, letting it continue down. Even with the fabric between her hand and my skin, her touch leaves me breathless. I can't resist, I let my hand follow the deep neckline, I feel the goosebumps my touch creates, it makes me smile. We kiss, but it's hard, none of us have any breath left.

I don't want to, but I tear my lips away from hers, she gives me a disappointed look, and tries to give me her puppy eyes, begging for more. I giggle, and give her a short kiss. I pull her in for a hug, "Baby, I just want to take you home, lay you on our bed and make love to you, but there's a party awaiting us." I whisper in her ear.

"We don't have to go home, I hear there's a beautiful beach around here somewhere!" She pulls back a little, raising her eyebrows and gives me that cheeky grin. "Sorry baby, I want to, but there's people waiting for us." I give her a kiss, she stares at me, "I thought it would be just us?" She's surprised. I grin at her, that's what I wanted her to be."Well… I guess I invited one or two to join us!" I teas her.

I grab a secure hold of her hand, she ain't getting a chance to run out on me. We walk into the Surfclub, we are received with applause and cheering. I can't help but noticing that some of the guys choked on their beer as we arrived. I'm not sure if I should laugh or cry. It looks like their minds are going to fry.

I don't blame them though, one glance at my girl and you have no thoughts left in your brain. She is all mine. I look at her and grin, I want to kiss her so bad, but I think those poor guys wouldn't be able to handle it.

"Honey, just so you know it, you're mine. If I see one guy hitting on you I'm going to knee him!" She wraps her arm around my waist pulling me closer. I turn to face her, I let my hand rest on her cheek. "Baby, if anyone looks at you too long, I'm going to come up with a real bad excuse to have him arrested. You're mine! I love you baby!" I'm sure all the guys are going into melt down, I don't care, I have to kiss her.

-----

I'm really nervous, the night has been marvelous, we've had a great time. Chatting with friends, being amused by Colleen. We had to invite her, she is a friend of everybody here, and I think she would have come no matter what, there's booze here. So no need to be difficult, we invited her. She isn't comfortable with us, maybe it's her age, she is of the old school, and I guess we can't hold that against her.

She is funny though, she's trying to pretend that we're not a couple. Well, whatever rocks her boat. After tonight, she can't pretend anymore though, poor Colleen, I hope her head doesn't explode.

The time has come, Joey is looking strange at me. No wonder, I'm trembling in my seat next to hers. I know it's the right thing, she is my one and only, I'm here to stay, always.

I squeeze her hand before I rise up and calls for everybody's attention. They starts to cheer for a speech. Alf finds a box for me to stand on, it feels weird. I have everyone's eyes on me, but all I want to see is my Baby.

I find her eye's, she is looking a little flabbergasted, I smile at her, finding in her eyes the reassurance that I'm doing the right thing. "Joey, I want to take this opportunity to tell you, to reaffirm that you will always find that you are my one and only. No exceptions from this rule. You can ask anybody in here, they will all confirm that. Baby, my heart beats only for you. Every heartbeat bears your name. I love you baby, I'm here to tell you that I'm here to stay. You ask so little from me, but I want to give you the world. I'm asking only for one thing, and that is for you to let me love you every hour, every day!"

I feel tears burning in my eyes. I love her so much. She has tears running down her face. She raises and comes towards me. I step down from my box, receive her with open arms. She kisses me, I welcome her. The whole world may be watching, but I don't care. I just want to show her and everyone around us how much I love her.

"Charlie, honey, I love you, I want to be with you for the rest of my life. There's no one else for me, you are my one and only. I'm here to stay, we have been through hell and back, but we came through. Everything that we have experienced has allowed us build a foundation of love that passes the test of time. Charlie, I can't live without you. You are my rock, you are the air I breathe, you are my life!" tears run down my cheeks as I hear her speak. I lean my forehead against hers, gazing into her wonderful eyes, they too are running over with tears.

I tell her to stay right where she is. I have to get what I want to give her, I search for my purse, I kind of have lost all my reasoning, a certain young lady is to blame for that. I finally find it exactly where I left it, on my chair… I giggle at myself, I'm kind of nervous. I can feel that Joey's eyes has followed me the whole time. Her big, beautiful brown eyes are even bigger than normal. I step up to her again, hiding the ring in my hand, I grab a hold of hers with my other.

I giggle again, she probably wonders if I have gone insane, well, I have, I'm insanely in love with her. "Baby, it might seem like I'm on edge, but Baby, I love you, like I said, I'm here to tell you, I'm here to stay. Our relationship started out with me being terrified of what people might say if they found out about us. I was such an ass. I want you to know that I want the whole world to know just how much I love you." I revile the ring in my hand.

I look at her face, her jaw has hit the floor, she looks at me in disbelief. "Baby, there's only one name in my heart, it's you. I want to be with you for the rest of my life, and I want to give you this ring as a symbol of my love for you."

I look intently into her eyes as I speak. I can see the expression change from disbelief into belief. I can see the love she has for me. It shines through her eyes. "Charlie, I thought that you couldn't make me any happier, I thought I had met the highest state of bliss. Honey, I was wrong. Hearing you say those words makes my heart trying to beat its way out of my chest. I want to scream and shout of joy, I love you so much, I want to be with you every hour, every day for the rest of my life! I love you!"

Even though I can hardly see for the tears streaming from my eyes, I find her hand, and she willingly let me place the ring on her finger. I lean in and kiss her, not a little peck on the lips, but a deep, passionate one. I want her.

A sound of heavy sobbing draws my attention away from her. I take a look around to see what's happening. I quickly localize the source as Colleen. She is sobbing into her handkerchief. I don't know if it's out of disgust over our affection, or?

"I'm sorry, "She stutters. I stand with my arms still around Joey. I'm not letting Colleens reaction tear me away from my Baby. "I'm such a stupid old bath, I'm sorry I have made things difficult for you…" It's hard to make out what she's saying, she is a little drunk, and the sobbing doesn't make it any better. "I can see that you two really love each other, and the speech was so beautiful. Oh, forgive me for being so stupid, I am really happy for you." She sob some more.

My heart gets warm from hearing what she says. I'm not going to hold a grudge against her. She might be drunk, but I believe she means what she says. Joey is just one big happy smile, we walk over to Colleen, giving her a hug. Probably almost giving her a heart attack at the same time, since Joey and I are not going to let go of each other.


End file.
